Autism Information

Question: My boyfriend has high-functioning autism, what i can do to help him?

(Posted by: PennyLane isin your bloodstream♫ on 2010-07-19 11:23:03)

I couldn't even tell he was autistic....i don't care that he is....i want to know how i can help him...for whatever reason i'm the only one who he can look directly in the eyes...i use this to my advantage so he'll talk to me...i let him take as long as he needs...it take hours sometimes but i think once he talks to someone it really helps him...but i want to know if there is more i can do... so i shouldn't force him to talk to me? maybe force was to strong of a word...i don;t force him...i more persuade him to talk to me.

Posted by: Cory Graff on 2010-07-19, 19:50:14

This is coming from someone who has a mild case of autism himself: Whatever you do, don't leave him. You may be his only interaction with people outside his family(or indeed, with anyone). He could be depressed; Does he just sit there for time on end? Does he cry without any reason? Show that you care for him, it could mean the world to him. Keep talking, he'll open up eventually, but don't force him.

Posted by: Astaroth on 2010-07-19, 11:30:42

Just be patient and understanding. He may have several quirks that other people will find "odd " and he may have trouble with situations that other people take for granted. You've just gotta be there for when he needs you and understand when he says "I've gotta get out of here. " It can be really difficult for him to explain how he feels and sometimes he may seem distant. This doesn't mean that he doesn't care, just that he may lack social skills that come naturally to other people. Remember that there are support groups for people suffering with autism and people who are close to them.

Posted by: Astrophel on 2010-07-19, 12:58:53

Encouraging him to talk might be good, but no, you shouldn't force him to talk to you if he doesn't want to. He may have a very hard time expressing and understanding his feelings, so don't pressure him to do something that he can't. If I were you, I would learn about autism and try to understand how he feels. Jim Sinclair's website (see source) has a lot of information from the perspective of an autistic person, but in a way that non-autistic people can understand.